Trust… or the lack there of, is the basis for the quality of relations. I find myself disappointed on this beautiful day. The day is beautiful. Someone I trusted to cover my back did not. They also failed to follow through by letting me know they would be unable to cover my back. Rules and guidelines are important. They help a child become a productive, active adult and member of society. When followed, the rules will yield a sense of what is right or what should be. Thus yielding a feeling of safety and security and… Trust.

Last Friday, I made a simple request of a friend with whom I am working on a project. I requested this person relay an important message to another person. There was no follow through. This reminds me of the fact that there is one person I can count on, me. Even that I wonder about somedays. Now I’m not meaning to be cynical. It is just nice when you ask something of someone and they actually follow through.

One of my mentors would ask, “Where else is this showing up in your life?” Or “What are you supposed to learn from this?” Another of my mentors would remind me, “We learn the lessons we learn and go through the experiences we do to teach the people we will minister to.”

Personally, I have a love/hate relationship with rules. I love boundaries and guidelines, because they help me know what is expected of me and thus how to help others. I have also held firmly, since childhood, that rules are made to be broken. Someone else’s pre-determined self limitations do not apply to me. If you believed everything said to you, knowing that 80% of incoming information is negative, you probably would not be the amazing person you have become.

So the lesson in this for me today is not to take it personally. Seldom is it. Most people don’t think that deeply about anyone other than themselves. For now I will not rely on this person again. Further, I will do my best to step up more in my own life and follow through with anything asked of me or anything I say I will do.


James Christopher

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